Prepare For Openness

5 MIN READ

Who here has ever looked in the mirror and had a momentary flash of fear that they are simply not worthy? Who knows what it feels like to feel lost in a disconnected, mechanical lifestyle? How many have done their best to make the “right” decision every time, and yet somehow these choices have lead them to a place that feels very, very wrong? Who is worried that at some point they have swapped passion for function? Exchanged daring for security? Hunger for satisfaction? Who wants to be hungry again?

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The problem is that we have been caught in the trap of trying to pursue a version of success that doesn’t suit us … so somewhere along the line we gave up on the child-like hope that makes us wonderfully open to everything that we can offer the world.  Now, we live every day in ‘defend and protect’ mode.

I am here to tell you that continuing this lifestyle will paint you into the world’s most isolated corner of exhaustion and despair. Even worse than this though, is the ongoing cost of this lifestyle, because it is built on you defending yourselves against the very things that could be used as a chance for growth

We Prepare the core of our Infinite Self for living with liberated Openness by ridding our inner selves of old baggage and excess waste

We Prepare ourselves for deep lasting fulfilment when we truly know who we are in our Infinite Self, in purity and unique perfection. This includes the cleansing that results from coming to know that we are not our flaws, we are not our actions, we are not our past decisions or experiences.

Human beings have lots of things in common with all other living creatures. We need nourishment to give us energy, we Respond to the world around us, we Grow, we Move, we Reproduce. As living things, we also Excrete waste. Our Excretory system is hardly the glamour child of our human condition, and yet we all know how disastrous it can be if it isn’t serving us properly. Our body relies on us taking in the nutrients to transform it into the Power we need to run our body’s normal life processes. But the body also needs to do something with the waste it creates along the way. We would be in trouble if our skin didn’t work to get rid of waste, and if you have given birth to even one child you will know that you don’t get very far through the day without a toilet stop.

I am proud of living a life that surpasses resilience, and I would like to tell you about the time where I learned about steps we can all take to cleanse ourselves of old, unwanted baggage. I hope that this will help your Infinite Self to travel lighter and more free than you could have possibly imagined.

I married my first husband Adam in 1994, when I was nineteen years old. Adam had many attributes that drew me to him, and we are still close friends to this day. In hindsight though, I have realised that Adam was attractive to me at that stage of my life simply because he was the exact opposite of my father.

Both of these men would agree they are nothing like each other. While Adam has always been fun and easy going, my Dad was a picture of work-driven ambition, proudly serving in the Australian Army and ruling our home with an iron fist. I was not close with my dad as I grew up, and even though we enjoy a much more genuine, respectful relationship now, my younger self wanted nothing more than to make a life that was completely different from the one I had known. The plunge I took with Adam into an early marriage was fuelled by my desire to escape my childhood baggage, and unfortunately hastened due to me falling pregnant. This situation is tough for any unwed teen, but it was particularly rough going for me as a youth leader in a church where sex outside of marriage was strictly forbidden. I faced the isolation of disapproval and rebuke at every turn.

Life has taught me that time passes and things change. It didn’t take too long for things to settle down, and thankfully other people’s real life dramas removed mine from the blazing scrutiny of the social spotlight. With the wheels of my life in motion, I stayed at home to care for Zac, my beautiful baby boy. After a couple of domestic years rolled by, I fell pregnant again, this time with my precious daughter Isabelle. My life ticked all of the boxes that you would expect. Things seemed to pan out for me just like all the other girls who start their life loaded up with the weight of old mindsets and unresolved conflicts.

I am sure that things could have continued on like this for the rest of my life. But I was absolutely miserable. By the time Isabelle was two years old, I was drowning in the deep waters of frustration and things needed to change. I decided to leave altogether, and took the next twelve months of my life to conduct a complete overhaul. As my Dad would say, I took a good hard look at myself. In my words, I took time to Prepare.

This time of Preparation was the first time that I had stood up and resisted the flow that had taken me where I didn’t want to go. To redirect my course, I needed to be brutally honest. I had to face the fact that I was lost and hurting, and that I had dreams and ambitions that demanded attention. I had to admit that I had been terrified of my strengths even more than my weaknesses, and that I had hidden behind a life time of excuses and laying blame elsewhere. I had to decide that I would learn how to see myself as beautiful, powerful and successful, and that I would not listen to the old scripts of doubt and fear and failure. To connect with this person who needed freedom, I had to make the brave commitment to pursue growth that would change everything I thought I knew. It was only in taking time to Prepare that I could come to cleanse myself of old hurts, to rid myself of destructive mindsets, and to replace negative ways of living with new habits that would be able to accommodate deep, lasting fulfilment.

Our Infinite Self is intuitively Open to all good things in the world. We all flow naturally in a state of seeking out our next big change to live, to love, to serve with abandon. Making the gut wrenching decision to leave my old life taught me three things that will help us to understand how to rid ourselves of the excess waste that is trapping us into a life that is defensive and closed.

  1. RID YOURSELF OF DOING TO PRIORITISE BEING: Our actions cannot create who we are. Our actions can liberate us only if we use them to reflect who we are.
  2. RID YOURSELF OF LIES AND EXCUSES: Brutal honesty is the freedom policy. It is only when we are transparent with ourselves that we can connect with our world in fullness.
  3. RID YOURSELF OF DESTRUCTIVE SCRIPTS: Listen carefully to the stories you tell yourself and others, and rewrite any words that diminish your value.

Control-Alt-Delete

4 MIN READ

Real life throws challenges our way every single day. I have noticed that some people struggle through even the smallest of challenges, while others can transform the toughest situation into life changing opportunity. The incidence of mental illness is increasing so rapidly in this country that it is expected to be our society’s leading health problem by 2030. It is becoming increasingly urgent for us to develop the skills we need to respond to adversity with power and optimism. We all know that life can be genuinely hard, but you are the only person in the entire world with the power to awaken your True Self. And the way you do this is by deliberately, strategically breaking into who you are to change what you find.  I am here to tell you to empower yourself to Unstoppable Freedom!  We need to unlock the words that we think and say to transform how we see the world. Because How you see determines What you see.

There are three simple steps that I know from experience will help you get started on this journey.  Your Unstoppable Freedom needs you to:

Control-Alt-Delete

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My life is built on the power of my words to promote growth through life’s toughest days

I live by this process every single day. It’s a one trick wonder that can be reused for the rest of your life. At first it will feel clunky because you will be liberating your True Self for the very first time, but as you practice, you are going to become an expert at putting yourself through this cycle. It will become your intuitive response to everything life could possibly throw at you, and it will become the passcode to the new life that you create along the way.

Let’s start with Control.

You are the boss of you. You’re the boss of your words. You’re the boss of your thoughts. You’re the boss of your actions. So then, it follows that you are the boss of your feelings. This is very, very important. If we are going to learn how to empower ourselves so that we can transform even the toughest challenges into life changing opportunity, we need to realise that we are the boss of our feelings, and that our feelings can be controlled by the words we say, first to ourselves, and then to other people.

Now let’s be honest. This Control idea doesn’t mean that we have control over the things that are happening around us. We all know that there are things that happen without our permission. God knows I would love to have been in control of some of the disasters that have punctuated my life story.

But your problem isn’t the problem: The deal-breaker here is your reaction. The reality is we don’t have control over some of the events in our life, but what we can control is our response to it. How we react to life’s challenges, or how we respond to life’s opportunities literally changes our course forever. Viktor E Frankl puts it perfectly:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

In every single circumstance there is an opportunity just waiting to be realised, and by controlling the way we see things – controlling our thoughts and our talk – we can start to turn situations around and see opportunity where there used to be disaster or crisis. Let’s stand up!  Let’s take control of ourself, our choices, our behaviour, and we do this by controlling the words that we are saying to ourselves.

With the Control part sorted, the next step is ALT.

We awaken our True Self when we realise the power we have to Control ourselves and our direction, but we enlighten ourselves only when we start to alter what we find inside. We need to be really honest with ourselves. How do I see myself? What does my perfect life look like in my imagination? These questions are so important that I suggest taking a minute now to reflect and write your answers down.

You need to be able to see what’s there inside you, and when you know what’s there, you have the power to change it. This is the key to combatting stress, fear, loneliness, anxiety, hopelessness. Your new words are going to remind you that you are powerful over yourself, and that you can implement choices that target your perfect life.

Now we have Control over our words, and we have altered what we say to ourselves, next comes Delete, because you will have some cleaning house to do. You need to start deleting some of your old thoughts because they don’t serve the person you are releasing from within, and they don’t allow you to pursue the life your soul longs for. Your old thoughts mask your True Self in surrender and despair, and they hide your perfect life in fear, and procrastination and doubt.

The only way that you are going to be able to Delete the old is if you have new words to replace them. We are humans, so we can’t format our hard drive like a computer.  Our memories and our subconscious learning will always be there … but we can replace, we can recreate, we can redefine ourselves. This is how humans change and grow. We control our words to alter our outlook, then we delete the old words we used to say so that we can enjoy being our True Self, and chase down our perfect life.